Sunday, November 02, 2008

Communist Party wants Bond Girl to Capture Daniel Craig

Just read it for yourself, hat tip to Pavel Yakovlev, and here is a snippet:

Ukrainian Olga Kurylenko, 28, plays a Russian-Bolivian agent who falls for Bond in Quantum of Solace, which opens in cinemas across Britain on Friday night.

But the Communist Party of St Petersburg is taking the action movie very seriously indeed, having accused her of helping "a man who worked for decades under the orders of Thatcher and Reagan to destroy the USSR."

In a message on the party's website, it said: "The Soviet Union educated you, cared for you and brought you up for free but no one suspected that you would commit this act of intellectual and moral betrayal."

The party went on to appeal to Kurylenko to use her feminine wiles to get Bond - or Daniel Craig - to "tell what other plans are being written in the Pentagon and Hollywood to discredit Russia and drive a wedge between the Russian and Ukrainian people."

The party's leader, Sergei Malinkovich, said: "Everyone knows that the CIA and MI6 finance James Bond films as a special operation of psychological warfare against us. This Ukranian girl sleeps with Bond and that means that Ukraine is sleeping with the West."

He added: "Now she has the right to choose - to become a collaborator or capture Craig and hand him over to the Russian security services for interrogation.”

What's your favorite part of this story? That the leader of a political party has a conspiracy theory involving MI6 financed Hollywood movies, which apparently have links to plans with the Pentagon? That they see themselves as gracious educators of the Ukranian people? That they see her as having the right to "choose" to capture her costar and turn him over to the authorities, where I'm sure he'll receive the humane treatment that communists are so well known for?


Unknown said... I personally like the conspiracy theory the best :)

Matt E. Ryan said...

I think the economist in me likes the "we educated you for free" part.

Anonymous said...

as a former soviet, i guess i like the part where the bond girl needs to capture that capitalist pig, daniel craig, and make him pay for his crimes against unwashed masses. crush him. ;)